A temporary thought on the way dalam kereta tutup radio. Focus on road, illusion on these temporary stupid thoughts.
Sambil menikmati jalan sunyi dua pagi dengan lampu highway, terfikir sedikit, dalam banyak-banyak benda yang jadi, what if, sebenarnya orang yang sebenarnya kita perlukan selama ni depan mata, sentiasa ada tapi tak perasan. Bukan untuk berperasaan, tapi cuma niat murni berkawan. Just that, tak lebih-- but he's the one? Apa jadi?
I believe life has its own surprises.
I have lots of amazing best friends. I mean, not that lot, but aku akan make sure they would be my bridesmaids with baju melayu and kurungs on my wedding day. They're nice and aku berharap sangat perempuan-perempuan, lelaki-lelaki tu hargai diorang macam aku hargai diorang. Ada dengan diorang macam aku ada dengan diorang.
Kadang-kadang terfikir, kenapa orang-orang amazing semua jadi setakat kawan je eh? I mean like, obviously I don't deserve better than them. They're the best kot? Kenapa eh semua benda tak goes smoothly as it is like everybody else.
Or maybe, Tuhan nak tunjuk dulu kot how gempak, baik dan awesome sekeliling aku yang selalu menyakitkan hati tapi ada. Yang selalu bahan maki caci tapi berusaha. Yang kenal baik buruk sampai kena bluetick Whatsapp pun bukan hal. Alhaamdulillah untuk manusia manusia yang sentiasa ada.
Tak pernah nak rilek-rilek macam orang lain. Like, how could they be that easy. I mean, how can it be THAT easy to fall in love? To like someone? To give your whole to them? To just, love. Macam dunia ini ana yang punya.
But don't worry about me, I got me. I always got me.
"You sedar tak you dah sabar sampai tahap ni? Like how could that be? Sampai tahap ni tau, Sa."
No kidding. Sampai tahap yang diri sendiri tak sedar how could I survive. How could it happened. Perit kot nak hadap segala macam pancaroba if it involves feelings keparat. Its easier when you heartless. Serious shit.
Memang noobshit, I am always unlucky in love.
But I'm blessed to be surrounded by amazing friends. Wallah.